Tag Archives: Covid-19

Posted on

Kids & COVID-19

Girl sitting at the table

When life is stressful, kids look to adults show them how to respond.

Most people have heard about Mr. Rogers’ response in times of trouble. He said, “when I was a boy and would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, ‘Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.'” I have found this message to be a comfort time and time again.

Children take their cues from adults. If we are scared and anxious and panicked, they will be too. However, if we are calm and confident that things will be OK, they, too, will rest in that assurance. The hard part is when it feels like things are falling apart around us and we don’t feel calm and confident. What do we do then? Fake it? Well, that’s one option. Let’s talk about some others.

  • Practice Self Care – Finding ways to process hard things and stay regulated is critical to creating a peaceful environment for your kids. So, do all the things that help you offload stress and anxiety – paint, craft, mow the grass, do some calisthenics, pray, journal, organize the linen closet, read, watch a funny show, play a game, phone a friend, have some closet time. 🙂 Even being stuck at home, there are tons of options to help us unwind.
  • Think in Terms of Prevention and Intervention – Both kids and adults need special things to keep us from reaching our limits, as well as, to calm down when we get there. Getting plenty of sleep, staying hydrated, eating well, avoiding sugar, connecting with others, having down time – these are great ways to boost our capacity to manage frustration and PREVENT meltdowns. And for INTERVENING when the meltdowns come, try some of those same things or these: time away, soft music, movement, coloring, building, a lovie – the list is endless.
  • Limit Overstimulating Activities – Although being stuck inside seems like a great time for screen time (after all, it does keep them quiet), the research is clear that screens actually disrupt the brain’s ability to regulate. What we see is a delayed response that is often hard to connect back to the devices. I’m all for a fun show or educational game or interesting research – in moderation. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends only an hour of screen time a day for children ages 18 months to 5 years. As for older children and teens – the most I’ve seen recommended is two hours a day. Not very much, is it? To better understand how electronic medias affect your child and her developing brain, as well as, to take charge of electronics and create a Family Media Use Plan, check out these articles: Infants and Preschoolers and School Aged Children and Adolescents
  • Promote Play – Think back to when you were growing up and all the ways you played: hide and seek, building forts, barbies, Legos, arts and crafts, coloring, pretend play, cars, rocks and sticks, running and jumping and bicycling… Although a few of those things cannot be done in quarantine, so many others can. Even though children might balk at giving up screens, once they are engaged they usually won’t remember what they are missing. Pull out old toys and games and play with them, just to get them started. Small children sometimes need to be taught how to play and then given the freedom to do it their way. Choose a phrase from play therapy, “at our house, you can do that any way you’d like” to unlock their creativity.
  • Explore Sensory Activities – we hear more and more about sensory processing and how our senses affect our mood (think weighted blankets.) I wish I knew then what I know now about the power of sensory activities. And when I say “then”, I mean always. It’s amazing how powerful it is to identify which sensory experiences dysregulate kids (and adults) and which ones regulate us. To learn more about how this works, check out the AMAZING resources below. These books are full of fun, engaging, sensory informed play for kids. AND the activities are simple and inexpensive. Win Win.
  • Give Kids Feeling Words – Children don’t know how to express what they feel. They need us to teach them how to do that. The more we talk about our own feelings and name the feelings our kids seem to be displaying, the more competent our children will become in expressing theirs. It is critical that we give kids the freedom to feel the way they feel. This doesn’t excuse bad behavior that comes from big feelings. In fact, expressing feelings in healthy ways will reduce, and eventually eliminate, those behaviors. We need to teach kids that it’s OK to feel mad, sad, disappointed, frustrated, etc, but it is not OK to hurt ourselves or others when we feel those ways. Children need to be actively taught how to process and offload those kinds of feelings. And you are the perfect person to do just that. I’ve included more of my favorite resources to start the process below.

Sensory Resources (post includes affiliate links)

Feelings Resources (post contains affiliate links)

In uncertain times, we have to remember what is certain. For me, it’s knowing that Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. And He sits at the right hand of His Father, who is STILL on His throne. Remembering this allows me to be a helper. The children in your life are looking for helpers. They are looking to you. I know you are up to the task. If there is anything I can do to help you navigate these difficult days, please reach out here. We are all in this together!

Warmly, Erin

Posted on

Keep Calm and Carry On

Two brothers eating ice cream

Whether you are high strung or easy going, uncertain times create tension for everyone. 

In this high-speed, connected world, that tension can easily become bigger feelings like anxiety, fear, frustration, anger and worse – panic and despair.

I have to admit that I can struggle with anxiety in normal, everyday life. So, of course, things like Covid-19 play hard on that inclination. Uncertainty leaves me feeling out of control. As someone who thrives on “always being prepared”, feeling unprepared is scary. And I have to fight against the fear and panic that threaten to set in. Do you? How about those you love? 

When we listen to the fear, it is a short trip down the proverbial rabbit hole to losing our minds to panic, which can quickly become mass chaos. Think Lord of the Flies. Ugh. 

In 2000, the British discovered posters designed to prepare the English people for the Blitz that was to come with WWII. Although 2.5 million were produced, only a few were ever seen publicly. The words, Keep Calm and Carry On, have re-emerged as memes across social media. But as the Brits knew back then, it is important for us to keep to our senses in times of crisis. To do otherwise seals our fate. 

Personally, I am reminded of the following scripture: 

“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind.”

II Timothy 1:7

Did you know there are over 365 verses in the Bible that speak about fear? And they all point to two truths:

  • Fear is not from the Lord and
  • We need not be afraid because HE WILL NEVER LEAVE US.

(Check out a few of these here: Deuteronomy 31:6, Psalm 4:8, Philippians 4:6-7, Isaiah 41:10 and Psalm 23)

The truth is that in the midst of the Corona Virus or the Tennessee tornadoes or the dropping oil prices or the stock market crashes, He is still on His throne. And He gives us hope for our future. 

So, what can we do to avoid the panic? How do we come together in times of crisis, instead of turning on each other? What do we do to take care of ourselves and our families? Here are a few ideas. 

  • Manage your own mental health. Keep a positive and hopeful perspective. Focus on what is true and not what the fear wants you to believe. Make an appointment with your counselor or coach. Most of these professionals are set up to do phone or video appointments, especially now. 
  • Prepare. Just as Joseph prepared Egypt for the coming famine, we should use our sound minds (as Paul wrote) to have the things our families need, should we become ill or need to be quarantined.
  • Love each other. Don’t succumb to hoarding things that you don’t need. Leave some for others. Give generously when others don’t have what they need. Care for families who are ill or have tragically lost loved ones. Pay attention to those in your sphere. Remember that the people who are sick are not to blame for this pandemic. Separate your criticism of governments’ decisions from the people who inhabit those countries. 
  • Be informed. Know what is true. Do your homework. Follow credible sources at their origin.  
  • Keep yourself healthy. If you aren’t healthy, how can you help your family or do your important work? Cut down on sugar, caffeine and alcohol. Fear and hard feelings draw us to these things – be mindful and resist the urge. Exercise. Take Vitamin C. Stay home when you are under the weather. Wash your hands. 
  • Breathe. Find ways to stay calm. Pause before speaking or acting when you are feeling afraid or angry. Pray.

We have a responsibility to care for ourselves, our families and our community. I challenge each of us to find practical ways to do that very thing. 

Jesus said, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”

Matthew 22:37-40

There are a few professionals I am following for wise counsel and helpful tips on how to prepare and take care of myself until Covid-19 passes. I’m including two resources below for your convenience. Although lots of medical professionals are sending emails with valuable information, these two have dedicated web pages they are updating regularly. The important thing is to find someone you trust, who is giving wise counsel and not promoting fear.

The truth is, it will all be OK. We just don’t know what OK looks like, yet. There will be suffering. People might die. Our conveniences might be disrupted, but maybe that’s not such a bad thing. I’ll let you know if my opinion changes on that. LOL.

Know that I am walking with you in the journey. If there is anything I can do for you, don’t hesitate to reach out. You can email me directly at [email protected].